Gay Christmas

Singer-Songwriter Tom Goss released a music video this year, hoping to capture the experience of LGBTQ people for whom the holidays are not very joyful.

For many LGBTQ people, Christmas, Hanukkah, New Years, and other festive occasions are times of isolation, loneliness, grief, pain, and anger. Some of us in privileged positions like to think that everyone enjoys peace and comfort in the company of loved ones during the holiday season, but for many people this is not the case.

In writing his song, "Gay Christmas," Tom tapped into his own personal experience, hoping that his personal journey (being gay around the holidays) will speak to others in the LGBTQ community who have experienced similar hardships. Although the word "gay" is in the title, the message of the song resonates with people across the spectrum community.

“Gay Christmas,” Goss explained, is for those people “who have felt like an outsider on what is supposed to be the happiest time of the year.”

Tom is originally from Wisconsin, but he now lives with his husband in LA. This year, he made the decision not to go home for the holidays. This song is about that decision.

In an email to the Huffington Post, Tom said, “Too many of us have had to learn to accept less from our families when it comes to fully embracing us for who we are."

Especially in light of the current political climate, many LGBTQ people face the task of navigating dicey political conversations, insensitive comments, and blunt, unkind opinions. Tom cites as an example the patently discriminatory platform of the current presidential administration, which sought to ban transgender people from serving in the military, among other overt practices of discrimination.

“Yet we are expected to be the ones to forgive, to ‘move on’ and pretend everything is okay,” he said, “even as the current administration and GOP keep supporting anti-gay politicians and policies.”

As allies, one of the best things we can do is simply listen. Watch "Gay Christmas," in the video below (or click here to be redirected to Youtube). Don't get defensive... just listen. Try to put yourself in his shoes (this exercise will be easier for some of you than others).

Please remember, the holidays are not joyful for everyone. This season, do whatever you can to extend a kind word... a generous deed... an affirmation... a warm greeting... a thoughtful gift... a seat in front of the fire. Peace on earth, goodwill toward humankind. All humankind.